One thing I have struggled with in my parenting is the role of the “strong will.”
I have a strong will, I always have had (and my mother likes to say every child is a strong-willed child), so I really don’t feel threatened by examples of will in my children.
I like to say: “I’d rather deal with the challenges of a strong will now than the consequences of a weak will later.”
But being a fairly honest person I have to ask myself sometimes whether I’m making a decision to train their will or indulge my own. Yes, it’s good to teach them to wait, but children are supposed to help their parents grow less-selfish too…
Many times the issue seems to come down to: Do I feed *their* self-centeredness or my own?
I have been praying about this off-and-on since last winter, and in Sunday school this morning I think I found a resolution.
We were talking about Jesus and how many times he made it clear he was not working from his own agenda, and someone read John 5:30.
The part I needed was, “My judgment is just, for I seek not to please myself but him who sent me.”
This was what I needed, because I am so concerned with justice; fairness. How could I know I was being just? I have to run it through this filter: Is this choice an effort to please God or to please myself?