While continuing to think about yesterday’s topic, marriage came up.
Now, I suppose an unmarried person would take an admonition to contentment differently, but as a married person I find it interesting that husbands and husband-behavior didn’t come up in our spontaneous list.
Most of that can, I believe, be attributed to the fact that our group seems to be full of contented women (a blessing I wish for every young wife– to be surrounded by contentment. It is a good training ground).
We have every personality-type represented in our small church, and a variety of marriage-types (God did such a good job pairing us off!).
It would be possible for any of us to look at one thing another husband does really well, and become discontented or angry with our own husband, but to seek contentment we can fall back to this test:
Have I prayed about this yet? Why do I want this/him to be different? So I will look better? So my life will be easier?
After this conversation about anger and wanting and covetousness, I understood for the first time why some women have become angry with me when I talk about my relationship with my husband: I have something they want, but don’t have.
Perhaps I can try to redirect their reaction to prayer before their response progresses to (this seems so weird) covetousness?
Maybe there’s nothing at all I can do.
Does this mean I should avoid talking about my (fabulous!) husband, like I should avoid talking about being a millionaire? (I’m not one, if you were wondering.)
I make it a point to not speak negatively of my husband, so someone might never guess what a truly balanced view I have of him, or make the (erroneous) assumption that he is perfect, or that I believe he is.
But it’s harder, I think, to not-talk about my husband than about anything else someone could envy.
I’m not really sure what the guidelines should be here.
I can’t control other people’s reactions, but I can pray for the sensitivity not to feed those reactions overmuch.
It’s an awkward balance to seek: modeling positive conversation about my husband (in the midst of husband complaints) without sounding like I’m gloating or exalting myself/my marriage.