Archive for April, 2006

Details

Saturday, April 29th, 2006
Now, I know I have a mind for details. Once I input them I usually remember them (I’d like a word stronger than “usually,” but no one can say “always”). So it’s funny/weird to me when I get asked questions I know they know the answer to. Or, at least, I remember previously giving them the information.Last Sunday I saw a woman I haven’t seen since Christmas Eve. She gave me one of those OHMYGOODNESS-looks, and asks, “Did I know you were pregnant?” I assured her, yes, I was showing at Christmas and we’d talked about it.

But maybe it’s not just her with this remembering I’m pregnant thing. Another friend I saw only a couple times a month would exclaim (every time she saw me), “Oh! I forgot you were pregnant!” Now, she had a lot on her plate, and I don’t mean this as any slur on her, but I don’t think I’ve ever forgotten a friend was pregnant (their due dates may come in-and-out of focus, but I don’t forget a baby is coming…) This happened most recently in mid-March, after which she said I was big enough now she felt she would remember.

I was never sure if I was “allowed” to laugh at her… befuddlement? Her tone when she said the words (this happened at least 4 or 5 times) was very-near comical. I suppose she was embarrassed. And I suppose this post could just make it worse…

But I’ll move on to the other pg-related thing that people seem to forget (Other than exact due-date, which is okay to forget, b/c it’s like trying to remember everyone’s birthday– you only do that if you have a thorough calendar. Mine was last Monday, BTW)

This “other” is whether we’re expecting a boy or a girl.

This pregnancy has been unique in that we feel fairly certain it’s a boy. We didn’t know the first two times until the birth. The conversational question everybody asks is, “What are you having?” I like to answer, “A baby.” Then they’ll say, “Do you know if it’s a boy or a girl?” “Well, those are the only options I’m aware of.”

This time I usually say some variation of, “The ultrasound said it’s a boy.” What’s funny to me are the people who ask (or congratulate us) more than once, w/o seeming to remember that we told them months ago (3 or 4 to date). And these are people who asked and were interested in the answer before.

Amazing.

Never having been in any head but my own, I shouldn’t assume everyone else thinks like me, but it is only natural, since I’ve only been in my own head, to assume what comes thoughtlessly to me shouldn’t be too much more strenuous for the rest of the world… But perhaps I’m beginning to learn otherwise…

Storytelling for SpEd kids

Tuesday, April 25th, 2006

I had a full day of employment today, and didn’t even really get to use it all.

Fairbanks Arts Assn. hired me to tell stories to the (primarily) Special Ed. students who were coming to their annual “Very Special Arts Day,” and I agreed, knowing I would have to do a lot of thinking/program-ordering on the fly, since there was no way to gage in advance the… mental abilities (or span of those) within any given group.

I settled on a handful of tried-and-true, back-pocket stories (things that I wouldn’t get flustered in if somebody got loud or something), and a few folktale picture books. (more…)

Connecting and purposeful parenting

Wednesday, April 19th, 2006
(Originally posted at Xanga.)I have these one-on-one consults I do for teaching FAM, and it is interesting to me how talking about something so personal seems to allow someone to completely open up about other parts of their lives.

I suppose I’m a fairly open person myself, so I didn’t think much about the freeness of others speaking to me until a few weeks ago when I told Jay my client and I had gotten off-topic quite a bit and spent time on parenting ideas.

“You really seem to connect with these ladies that come over,” he observed. And he’s right. I don’t know if it’s me, or the type of woman who comes (maybe a combination of the two), but, while we meet the goals of our time together, we never stay completely on-task.

One who came today commented as she was leaving how “inspiring” I was in the way I interacted with my girls. “That is so neat to see! I so want to be like that. I’m learning to be like that…” I thanked her for her kind words and said having the girls in a cooperative mood made maintaining that image a lot easier than it would be otherwise.

But it was encouraging to hear. Every now-and-then I get a really strong impression that I’m doing something right.

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Yesterday at MOPS, I got into this conversation about being purposeful in our choices as parents.

It started out being about looking for ideas to purposefully instill a godly foundation in our children. It surprised us how many people (even other moms in our group, from their comments) just “coast” along, without any plan. I can’t say I have any formal plan myself, but I have begun layering things into everyday routines, like the prayers at meal-times, and hymns and bible verses at bed-time, mixed-in with the lullabies and rhymes. I see these things laying a foundation; a vocabulary, if you will, that I pray I’ll have opportunity to draw on later.

The conversation moved into the importance of purposefulness in other areas of parenting: consciously observing your children to understand motivation, planning nap and bed-times so the child gets the sleep he or she needs, knowing your own child well enough to know what punishment is most effective in what circumstances.

We talked about the negative results of letting any of these things “just happen,” that it usually resulted in a need or opportunity being missed, or being less effective as a parent.

Conversations like these are very good for me, because they start me processing ideas and applications, and often bear good fruit. This time, it was encouragement “in due season,” giving me ideas as well as making me thankful for what’s going right so far.

“Truth Statements”

Thursday, April 13th, 2006

One of my LJ (Literary Journalism) teachers pointed out that authors are always declaring and defining reality. The do this whenever they assert something, or build on an assumption they’ve presented as fact.  She called these assertions “Truth Statements,” and we took time in class to write and share our own.
Well here are a few of mine. Most of them have to do with babies, because mine is on my mind right now. (more…)

More of the same, but different.

Monday, April 10th, 2006

Currently Reading
You Can Write a Novel (You Can Write)
By James V. Smith
see related

I’m still waiting, still reading, and still writing, but it’s all different too.

I have my laptop now (though nothing else of my many orders has yet arrived), and it’s already proving to be a wonderful resource/tool. I’ve been able to use it while “hanging-out” with the girls, during those times when they want me around (or I want to be there, to maintain the peace) but aren’t looking for direct interaction/play.

A good example of this is movies. I’ll usually let the girls watch one cartoon in a day, and they usually want me there with them while they do it. Since Thursday morning I’ve become very proficient at typing one-handed while I hold a snuggly bundle in my lap.

My reading is all over the place. One entertaining book is that “currently reading” selection above. It’s interesting b/c it’s different from nearly every other writing book I’ve read. The author starts out with the assumption you’re interested in writing b/c you want to be published, then lays down these formulae about what stuff a publisher will accept from an un-proven (1st-novel) author. He’s realistic-ish too, not too hard-line, and contradicts the other book I’m reading simultaneously (I’ll list it next time I blog, I suppose) which provides a fun contrast of views.

It’s just fun, b/c it’s so straight-forward (almost-but-not-quite a formula), and makes good sense.

For writing, I’m playing again (you’ll guess) with my novel. It’s been interesting applying a different framework (from this book) than I’ve used before. It’s almost like being back in a class, b/c I’m all motivated and focused again.

Well, as focused as one can be w/ the responsibilities of house and children hanging over me. I was up till (way-too-late) last night, just b/c my mind was so full, and I wanted to catch as much as I could.

I’ll be back at ToastMasters again tonight (took last week off) and that’ll be interesting. I’m going to have to reign-in my mind again and refocus it…

Maybe later…
Naptime’s just started, and in opposition to all good sense, I’m off to work on my story some more.

Waiting

Monday, April 3rd, 2006

It’s interesting hearing about how devoted our generation/culture is to “instant gratification.”

I can’t deny it, but today I’m recognizing a type of… affinity with previous generations: With the type that hovered over the Sears catalogue, looking for that perfect something, then waiting impatiently for the mail to bring the desired item.

I don’t know why it should feel like Christmas– after all, I paid for it myself, and I know it’s coming– but somehow checking the mail each day brings a tiny thrill of hope. Will there be something *extra* today?

This wondering (though not the anticipation) is slightly diminished with the packages that have tracking numbers, but many of the books I buy come media mail, and truly could come anytime in a 3-week span. The tracking numbers are great though– I’ve only got two more days until my computer shows up. This according to Fed Ex, and ahead of schedule.

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I ordered several things today, and maybe buying “so much” has got my blood up. I feel myself wanting to go out an buy something “for real.” Something I can hold (not groceries, that’s boring). I keep thinking of the collection of journals (blank books) I saw at B&N last week. There were some nice ones there…

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I had this feeling a lot when Jay was in Antarctica last November. I kept warning him that I was going to go out and buy something totally unnecessary, just ’cause I was dying to buy something. And the bigger the better

“I need socks,” he’d e-mail back. “Why don’t you get me some socks? Or groceries. You’re probably getting low on something…” This, I informed him, is not the type of shopping/buying I’m talking about. I wanted to buy… yet another journal, the perfect pen, some book I’ve been meaning to read, or a reference volume for my storytelling or FAM work. Something useless and fun.

Socks are neither.

Never got anything big, though. Closest I got was a couple tubes of bath salts.

Don’t remember if I even got to finish them both before Jay came home. Something about running water seems to draw my children from sleep…

I eventually gave-up.

Oh, I did buy a new palm pilot (PDA), but returned it before the trial week was up. Can’t remember now if that got the bug out of my system…